Tag Archives: Godliness

About Some Hard Truth!

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A young girl, gets influenced somehow and thinks it’s ok to have a boyfriend she talks with every other minute on phone, texts goodnight, go out for lunch dates, gets her pretty gifts on Valentine’s and take selfies and post on Instagram now and then.

He’s so nice to her and supports her decision of pursuing purity, he says it’s fabulous. Uhhhwww….he’s so cute right?
He invites her over to his place and even introduces her to his friends and family as his girl. You know, Steve Harvey says that if he introduces you to his people as a friend, it stays there, but a guy who is serious about you will let them know you are his girl. He did that, for the win!

He has time to listen to all her tales from how she finished her rice dish by picking a grain after the other to how she went to the salon to fix her weave and how she squabbled over home chores with her younger sister. He listens to all that crap! The bottom line is that he is too sweet to be true.

After some time, he knows how much she is used to him and how she will hardly turn him down when he asks for something. No he won’t ask for sex, he knows she’s keeping it for marriage. So he asks for a kiss, after all it’s just a kiss, not sex. She allows him to cus she too, she feels like if she doesn’t agree, she isn’t being fair to someone who has agreed not to have sex with her until marriage. He says he misses her so he asks for a nude picture. First, she cringes and thinks it’s crazy but he manages to convince her and reminds her how he’s turned celibate all because of his love for her and allowing him to see her nakedness will cool tempers down. Then she thinks about it then finally agrees with him and want to avoid fights so…. 📷Kr333!!!

If she was able to send a nude picture, foreplay and all…what is sex that they can’t have? Save a few girls who are determined to dismiss such offers and ultimately end the so called relationship. It’s pathetic to imagine.

Truth is, these days there are only a handful of very good guys left. The rest are scattered everywhere on the face of this planet. They have followed us to church because nowadays the church is the new arena for displaying new outfits and high heels and snap chatting while in church.
If then, why won’t they come and also look cool so they can lure them?

All these happen so that we become vigilant and wide-eyed so we are not swayed and deceived.
Ladies, we owe ourselves the honor of being Christ’s bride in all diligence until he sends a man after His heart in whom He is well pleased to present us back to Himself without wrinkles nor blemish.

Perhaps you didn’t know but now you know. Some guys are walking about as the devil’s incarnate searching for their next victim to deceive and have their way with and leave them wrecked. Don’t be their next victim by falling for their schemes. Don’t let it happen to you, you may not be able to pick up the pieces and put them back together. In the beginning, it looks harmless and cool. Anything that seems cool without the Jesus factor is no cool, it’s destruction. Let Jesus be your closest friend, He will lead you into all truth!

“Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.” Matthew 7:6
Ps: To the great guys doing it God’s way, it’s not old fashioned, keep it real!!! God bless you for reading.

Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

The Writer, Jackie.

The Writer, Jackie.

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NO SHADES OF GRAY PT 3

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    PART 3
    CHAPTER 10
    Fast forward today, i lay in the hospital bed with my mom and Oscar’s sitting beside me. My mom had called Oscar’s mom to tell her what she had seen and what had gotten me unconscious. They only knew the tip of the iceberg. They couldn’t wait to hear the story so I gave it to them.

    Before I met Oscar, I was in an “ungodly” relationship with Greg. Greg was a sweet guy but wasn’t saved. He wasn’t even a church-goer, at least. He was what we call “bad boy”. We used to have sex, go to the club and do all of the things that are considered “worldly”. My mom didn’t like my relationship with Greg neither did she like him. I loved Greg but I loved God. I will go to church on Sunday morning but spend the rest of the day with him doing what I shouldn’t be doing as an unmarried Christian lady. I wanted Greg as much as I wanted God in my life. But really, I couldn’t have my cake and eat it. I had to choose one. I remember he told me once bluntly that, it’s either I stayed with him or I left and focused on my God. He was sweet and charming and I couldn’t imagine leaving him. But I had to decide. I had reached a point in my life where I needed to take my relationship with God a notch higher, that was one of my new year resolutions. I knew I didn’t have to be a lukewarm Christian but I couldn’t help it so I stayed with him.

    CHAPTER 11
    When Oscar came into the picture, I realized that he was everything Greg wasn’t. He looked like a saint. He was God fearing but wore denim jeans and desert boots. He was different from the other church guys who still wore 15yards of trousers and had no chill. But Oscar!!!

    I didn’t think twice anytime I had to hang out with Oscar. Greg noticed I had changed but I couldn’t face him and tell him I was seeing someone I had wanted all this while. He loved me but not the kind of love that Jesus admonished the church to. His love was the “let’s make love if you truly love me” kind of love.
    He noticed my change of behavior and even caught me with Oscar one day. That was when he finally gave up and we broke up. I wasn’t hurt or broken hearted but I heard through some of our friends that Greg was having a hard time dealing with the break up, I cared less.
    As for my mom she was happy I had finally left the devil and met the saint, Oscar.

    CHAPTER 12
    Oscar had left his city to start a new life in my city where we met. His past was nothing good to write home about. Not knowing, he was a womanizer who had had almost 4 divorces. He used his charm on rich independent women and lured them to fall in love with him and eventually married them. He later poisons them or arrange with robbers to invade their house and operate. They kill the women and frame it as though they were indeed attacked. Oscar now becomes the rightful custodian of their money and properties then he relocates to another city for another candidate. I was going to be his 5th.

    However, the only son of his last late wife wasn’t having it. Prince, a junkie had escaped from the rehab center he was in when he heard what had happened to his mom and her money. He started tracking Oscar and threatened him to give him back what he had “stolen ” from his mom or he will kill him. Oscar as clever as he was will play on the guy’s intelligence, give him some money for drugs and hope that, that will be the end but this guy will show up again.
    In their last conversation, Prince threatened to ruin his wedding by killing his bride if he didn’t sign the power of attorney over his mother’s inheritance.

    Oscar still refused to budge and sign within the time frame he had been given. He thought I will be the one to be shot after all, he couldn’t be bothered.
    That fateful day, our wedding day, the tables turned and Prince executed what he had said he would. No, he didn’t shoot me for Oscar to escape? He shot Oscar and he himself was ran over by a tipper truck driver on the highway, we heard.

    CHAPTER 13
    Oscar’s mom buried her face in her palms and wept like a child.
    My mom apologized to me for contributing somehow to everything that had happened to me. She felt guilty. She was the one that influenced me even more to leave Greg and go after Saint Oscar.
    We left the hospital and I later found out that, in the season which Greg’s heart was broken by me, he found his way to church and surrendered his will to God, asked for forgiveness and set out on a whole new journey crazily for the things of God and totally in love with his new found love, Jesus. I heard he had even met a lady and they were preparing to get married.
    Until then, I didn’t know how much I loved Greg and how much I regretted for leaving him.
    I consoled myself. Perhaps we weren’t meant for each other or this is how it was meant to be.
    I went back to church, started the new converts class all over again, prayed more often and read the Bible like I should.
    I surrendered and gave my life back to God as a blank canvass and asked Him to paint it the way he wanted to.

    The END!

    DISCLAIMER:⚠️ The image of the person used in this story is not associated with the events in the story.It is only a fiction!

    ACKNOWLEDGEMENT: Thank you to Jemmy Monney for allowing me to use her photo. ☺️
    Written by Jackie Hanson
    www.thekhayilwoman.com

    The writer, Jackie Hanson

    The writer, Jackie Hanson

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Saved But Struggling Sexual Sin?

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These days, the world makes it look like, once you enter a relationship it is a license for sex to happen by all means. Or once you say you are in a relationship, chai! It is happening! Ah!!
Trust me, there are real young people out there who have vowed to keep themselves undefiled until marriage, both guys and ladies.
So don’t be amazed when those accusers come your way and don’t believe that you can still walk in purity this day. Because they’re blinded by sexual immorality, they think everyone else is like them.

However, the fact that you’re saved doesn’t guarantee you freedom over sexual sin. If not, after altar call and confessing Jesus as Lord and personal savior, we will sit down with hands folded and wait to go to Heaven but no. Salvation is a daily process. (See Philippians 2:12, Jude 1:3)
In fact, constantly, the flesh battles with its desires to yield to sexual sin. That’s why we need to mature in the fruit of self control, in endurance, and even, long suffering.

I thought I should stop by and remind you that been saved is only a tip of the ice -berg. You may be saved, yes, but you still live in the flesh and that’s more reason for you to strive and thrive that lust doesn’t consume you.

In your godly relationship, you both want to flee fornication but it doesn’t happen on a silver platter. So;

*Pray for grace and strength each day to continue victoriously on the path you’ve chosen. Sometimes it may look so difficult and impossible but know this, the reward of waiting is over the top, so keep on.

*Consider the places you go to sometimes . Some of the places you hang out together may expose and awaken love. (You know better)
To help you keep your vow to yourselves and to God, spare yourself going to places that may possibly arouse your feelings and lead you both into temptation.

*What kind of conversations do you engage in with your partner? Watch it carefully so you are not tempted to act out your conversation. If you can, I admonish that you keep your conversations sane and holistic. (See Ephesians 4:29)

Sexual sin doesn’t just happen to us. The more we feed it, the more ravenous and perversely diverse it becomes. And the more socially acceptable it becomes, the more it steals, kills, and destroys our lives. We have been saved and bought at a price. We need not let sexual sin ruin this price we have. So, at all costs, we must fight and flee it lest it make us a prisoner of war (1 Corinthians 6:18; 1 Peter 2:11). Some of you say, we can’t be perfect, granted. But in our imperfections, let us thrive to live like Christ.

I wish you a lifetime of grace in your pursuit of holiness . On your wedding day, the hosts of witnesses gathered should be able to say, “we believe in our spirits that God’s hands is in this and it will be forever.”

Some dating folks need to see this message, kindly share it with them. Thanks.

Light and Love,
The Khayil Woman💝

DISCLAIMER⚠️ “I am responsible for the themes I write on per my beliefs. You are responsible for how you understand and interpret it.”

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“My Marriage Must Work!”

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There’s no joy in living after your parents divorce. Sorry, but now you have to share in the bitterness that wells up in the parent you live with, especially mothers. You know how “petty” they become sometimes and how they will vent their spleen on you at the least provocation. The woes of a single mother as a result of divorce is nothing good to write home about.

Anyway back to the reason for this note. Your marriage must work, yes it must! If you have ever witnessed the harsh ordeal people go through because of an alcoholic, promiscuous, ungrateful, impatient and disloyal husband or wife, you can relate to this better.

You can’t afford a “try and error”. Some of us have been enlightened on some of the possible things that may cost us spending the rest of our lives in misery yet they are the very ones that entice us. Staying in toxic relationships and doing the do, attempting to change someone to fit in your mould, unequally yoking with an unbeliever etc…

Dear Christian Lady, (I address you because I can relate to you better).
I have never been married but I have seen and heard and sometimes shared the pain of the victims of this instance. In as much as God wants to bless us with good things, we also have a role to play. Let’s not pretend we don’t know the scriptures.

I know where I come from and its records, I don’t want to be told as another tale whose marriage didn’t work.
My candid prayer everyday, Lord, lead me and I will follow. Order my steps and open my eyes to see a “Boaz” when I meet one.
It’s a constant battle everyday with our preferences that tend to interphere with God’s plan. You see, while you want him tall and dark, God presents him short and fair😩.

But the real deal is, trusting God means, setting your preferences aside and putting yourself wholly into God’s and totally surrendering that, Lord do it your way. It means denying yourself of your choices and following God’s way.
So the ball is in your court. You still have the choice to choose whether to follow God’s plan for you or you follow your perfect choice of a dream man”.
I can guarantee that, once you allow God to make that choice for you, while you also play your role effectively like Abigail, Ruth, Rebecca, Esther, the Proverbs 31 woman etc… your marriage can’t go wrong.

So God help me and help me to trust your plan. In that I’m safe. Marriage is for better, for worse. Once you enter, no turning back. If then, what must we do?
By all means, my marriage and yours must work!! Share your thoughts with me.
It’s time to have a self check!

Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

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Jesus At The Center

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For the umpteenth time, I’ve been asked, “What makes a good relationship”? Let me attempt to answer but just so you know I’m not a relationship expert, in fact I am not even in one. Yet thank God for wisdom and grace to address some of these issues as inspired.

Without a shadow of doubt, I know, that a Christ-centered relationship will thrive.
I know you are itching your head and cringing at this and you are saying “it is not possible in this modern day”.
But lean forward and take this, the fear of God in us will compel us to trust and obey.

The fear of God in us alone will restrain us from doing things in our relationships that are not in agreement with God’s word. Should Nii and I make up our minds to pursue God and to walk with Him in our “dating” period, there will be no room for ungodly acts to have a place in our relationship. Just like David, we pray God, that His word will be hidden in our hearts so that we may not sin against Him.

When we become intentional about making Jesus the center of our relationships, it will be difficult for sin to have dominion over us.

It comes from two people who determine in their hearts not to allow the lusts of the flesh have control over their lives.

Two hearts who say Lord, it is not about us and our desires but doing what pleases you and gives you glory is our business.

Two minds who decide that we will not blend into society’s standard of right and modern but all that matters to us is, that your glory is manifested through our lives in our pursuit of purity.

It is because we trust God’s word that He will add all other things unto us if we seek Him first, so we will trust and obey!!

Not that we are not tempted to fall sometimes but the word of God in our hearts constantly reminds us “to put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts”.  Roman 13:14

May the joy of the Lord strengthen us and may the fear of the Lord in us compel us to build our relationships with Jesus at the center and focus! God bless you.

Light and Love,
Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

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Greatest Gift

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All those times I spent partaking in almost all the programs acting like the most spiritual person on earth were moments of my life I lived to please my mother. Yes because, I can never recall a time when I wouldn’t go to church and be home for no reason. I dared not miss or even be late for Sunday school. She will yell at me and give me a beating of a lifetime. She was a staunch Christian and a single mother who tried to inculcate in my little brother and I the fear of God. Yet, it always beat her mind why I would win the memory verse recitals competition and come back home that same day and tell a lie and commit other sins. What she didn’t know was that, the messages fell on deaf ears and the joy of going to Sunday school was to catch up with my friends.

I later grow up to realize that, all she did for me at that time was trying to give me a citadel of hope to rely on someday when she isn’t around.The best possession she could leave for me was to accept the hand of friendship Jesus Christ extends. Today is exactly nine (9) years after her demise and I now fathom that all the beatings were worth.

Now I understand what it means when people cry their hearts out and roll on the floor during worship. I understand when someone expresses how bad he/she desires to know the Lord and can’t have enough of Him. I get it when someone says they have been baptized by the Holy Spirit and are inspired by Him to will and do His will. I so much understand when someone says they are pursuing holiness and won’t make anything come between that. I get it when they say they got their eyes fixed on an eternal reward in Heaven. I relate to it perfectly. I admit i was only a church goer at the time but today, i can confidently say that I’ve been saved by grace and the logs from my eyes have been removed.

So you! You might have a similar story, better or worse. There’s still the opportunity to get to know Jesus Christ and build a personal relationship with Him. Not all the people who are in church all the time profess the faith. Just like everyone you see at the market goes to buy or sell. Nothing compares to knowing Him and possibly feeling Him so close like the garment we wear.

I wish I could have another phase of getting trained up again by her and to appreciate her better. I couldn’t have had a better mom. Everyone is proud of their mama for different reasons. I am proud of my mama for leading me to Christ and she deserves a standing ovation!

Mother, if you aren’t leading your baby to Christ, see Proverbs 22:6 “Train up the child the way he should go and when he grows he shall not depart from it”.

Ps: If your mother is still alive, savour every moment.

Why are you proud of your mama?

Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

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