Keep Pushing (Pt 1)


When i was in a relationship, i strived to do everything in my might in order to keep him and the relationship ablaze.
Knowing that there are ups and downs in relationships, i always tried to be my best until separation.
I did this because i cherished him and feared the consequence of a breakup, i thrived everytime to rekindle the affection that bound me to him.

Similarly when i got saved, i realized it’s the same walking with God. A decision to walk with God doesn’t guarantee the journey all rosy. Jesus Christ said, “if any man will come after me, let him deny himself,and take up his cross daily and follow me”. Luke 9:23
To me denying myself means, it’s no longer about me but about my master. It means that shunning everything i used to do that brought me pleasure but broke my better half’s heart. If i love Him like i profess, then i must strive to always keep Him close and not let anything come between us.

Sometimes, i wish i hadn’t surrendered. My peers are  out there enjoying themselves, wearing all em’ fancy clothes, and oh…using what they have to get all the luxurious things they want and doing all sorts of crazy things in the name of living life and i have decided to go after Jesus Christ. Really?
Anyone who said the journey of godliness was going to be easy told a big lie.

This is what happens to some of us sometimes. When we loose control of ourselves, the enemy feeds our minds with unworthy thoughts. He’s a destroyer and is always working his way through to get inbetween us and God. He gets us feeling miserable as though we are a loss and missing out on all the worldly pleasures.
Sometimes we feel reluctant to pray, read the Bible or spend time alone with God. Then it seems we are left between a rock and a hard place thinking “should i return  to the world or i should keep pushing through”?

Light and Love,

Signed: Jackie Hanson
(The Khayil Woman)


No Empty Dream


Those early morning mathematics and mental exercises way back
in primary school were complete turn offs for me. Pathetically, I will hide my
tiny self behind the front row seaters so the tutor won’t see me and even ask
me to solve some equations. I couldn’t stand the booing by my classmates once I failed. In fact, anything that involved calculation was too difficult to comprehend but definitely not 1+1. The feeling was galling!
I have always been one of the strong advocates who wish that Arithmetic is
abolished from the system somehow.

The euphoria however when time was up for English lesson was too awful for words. The loud wail of the siren that alerts pupils for change of subject especially when it was ENGLISH was quietly soothing. I will silently
say a prayer of gratitude to God for the ransom. Whew! Nothing compared!
In all aspects of the subject, I was
simply good! Now when time came for my mates to write letters to their pen-pals, they remembered they had a witty Jackie somewhere who could virtually translate all their feelings into words. Ironically, some of them were those who jeered. It wasn’t for free anyway. (Smirked)

Unlike other children who had a wide variety of dreams as they grew, mine was to become a Journalist or nothing below that. My mom helped the cause greatly. She inculcated in me
the habit of reading. I read anything from “Amazing to Zilch”!

As I grew, I couldn’t wait to become an ace in my chosen
field. I had some icons in the industry I looked up to like, really. Some recalcitrant felt they could take advantage but I didn’t let my guard down by the grace of God, I conquered!

My first time I heard myself on radio, it was a commercial I had made. Hahaha… you can never imagine the glee. Chills run through my spine and I felt so proud of myself. I was aboard a trotro. There and then, I wanted to exclaim ‘‘Hey you all, listen, that’s me on radio”. Lol. Well, burst your bubble, I didn’t. I felt fulfilled. The dream is become a reality, I thought to myself. I still work relentlessly to see its

I may not have been to the best schools or attained the highest feat in education. I may not come from an affluent home, but I possess
something unique that money can’t afford. That’s talent! Are you using your talent wisely?

Dreams are good and they really do come true. What’s your dream? Factor God into the equation for his plans for you are of good and not evil.
Don’t waver my friend. Strive hard;
go the extra mile and soon you will attain all your wildest dreams.

Light and Love,
Signed:Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman


Recuperation Process


Screenshot_2015-07-13-08-04-01-1Break up is never a pleasant thing to experience. Dealing with having to completely forget about a “sweet heart” and how to overcome the hurt after break up is even more devastating especially when you still love the person and can’t let go.

Whatever they said  was the reason to dump you like “i’m sorry,it’s not you,it’s me” “i don’t want you to get hurt…(but you’re hurting me anyway) “i need some space” ….blah! symbolises that they are done with you and are/have moved on.

In instances where your high expectations aren’t met,you’re left crest fallen and disappointed. The feeling is galling!Screenshot_2015-07-12-22-39-49-1

Must you still stay in the tunnel hoping he comes back to ignite the flame again? I’m sorry dear but some dreams donot come true. You got to rise up and shake the misery off at once. Here are some few nuggets i pray will be helpful.

1.Return To Your First Love:
Maybe your relationship wasn’t Christ centered so you invested some valuable time doing ungodly things to please your patner that you found little or no time for God. Now he’s gone and left you without a shoulder to cry on. Truth is,your first love, God, has been and is still patient waiting for you to return to be comforted by Him. Go back to Him in prayer for forgiveness. He will forgive and heal your bruises without a scar and give you hope.

2.Have Time For God:       Already you have spent enough time away from God seeking love that rendered you broken. Staying indoors crying over spilt milk won’t bring him back. Get busy working for God with your talent. You’ll experience a great feeling of joy as you keep doing what pleases Him. In fact,it’s a great thing to serve the Lord.

3.Stay Beautiful:         Most times girls especially, allow themselves for the breakup to have its toll on them. So obvious that one wouldn’t struggle to tell that she’s suffering a heart break. She leaves herself unappealing and virtually puts no effort to look good. You don’t want to give that guy reason to believe that you can’t live without him when actually you are better off without him.

Telling the world how broken you are by your appearance won’t majically join the pieces together. Add a touch to yourself and while at it, let your inner beauty glitter.

4.Let Go:                   Times will come when you will miss them but clearly this other person has managed to cut all ties with you. They don’t call or text and you want to tell them you miss them? That’s unwise! If they can keep their distance, why not you too? It’s not ego. It’s accepting the fact that sometimes in life you can’t have everything you wish to have”

5.Give Love A Chance:I think it’s awkward to conclude that you won’t love again. The fact that the former didn’t work out doesn’t mean the latter is bound to fail. Sometimes, such bitter experiences are meant to take us through the mill to prepare us for the future.

You may consider the failed relationship as God’s ways of delivering you from further harm, don’t be hard on yourself. By giving love another chance, it shows that you trust God and believe that He will honour you if you honour Him in His perfect time.

Open up and smile back at your potentials, you could be missing out on a great spouse God is working out for you…just because? Give love a chance, you need some affection in your life!

Recuperation is a process! I wish you well as you go through healing. Hope it ends well with you.Recuperation Process

Love and Light,
Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman