All posts by Jackie Hanson

Jackie Hanson is a Christian writer, Founder of The Khayil Woman, Voice over Artiste and an amateur Communications person.

About Some Hard Truth!

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A young girl, gets influenced somehow and thinks it’s ok to have a boyfriend she talks with every other minute on phone, texts goodnight, go out for lunch dates, gets her pretty gifts on Valentine’s and take selfies and post on Instagram now and then.

He’s so nice to her and supports her decision of pursuing purity, he says it’s fabulous. Uhhhwww….he’s so cute right?
He invites her over to his place and even introduces her to his friends and family as his girl. You know, Steve Harvey says that if he introduces you to his people as a friend, it stays there, but a guy who is serious about you will let them know you are his girl. He did that, for the win!

He has time to listen to all her tales from how she finished her rice dish by picking a grain after the other to how she went to the salon to fix her weave and how she squabbled over home chores with her younger sister. He listens to all that crap! The bottom line is that he is too sweet to be true.

After some time, he knows how much she is used to him and how she will hardly turn him down when he asks for something. No he won’t ask for sex, he knows she’s keeping it for marriage. So he asks for a kiss, after all it’s just a kiss, not sex. She allows him to cus she too, she feels like if she doesn’t agree, she isn’t being fair to someone who has agreed not to have sex with her until marriage. He says he misses her so he asks for a nude picture. First, she cringes and thinks it’s crazy but he manages to convince her and reminds her how he’s turned celibate all because of his love for her and allowing him to see her nakedness will cool tempers down. Then she thinks about it then finally agrees with him and want to avoid fights so…. 📷Kr333!!!

If she was able to send a nude picture, foreplay and all…what is sex that they can’t have? Save a few girls who are determined to dismiss such offers and ultimately end the so called relationship. It’s pathetic to imagine.

Truth is, these days there are only a handful of very good guys left. The rest are scattered everywhere on the face of this planet. They have followed us to church because nowadays the church is the new arena for displaying new outfits and high heels and snap chatting while in church.
If then, why won’t they come and also look cool so they can lure them?

All these happen so that we become vigilant and wide-eyed so we are not swayed and deceived.
Ladies, we owe ourselves the honor of being Christ’s bride in all diligence until he sends a man after His heart in whom He is well pleased to present us back to Himself without wrinkles nor blemish.

Perhaps you didn’t know but now you know. Some guys are walking about as the devil’s incarnate searching for their next victim to deceive and have their way with and leave them wrecked. Don’t be their next victim by falling for their schemes. Don’t let it happen to you, you may not be able to pick up the pieces and put them back together. In the beginning, it looks harmless and cool. Anything that seems cool without the Jesus factor is no cool, it’s destruction. Let Jesus be your closest friend, He will lead you into all truth!

“Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.” Matthew 7:6
Ps: To the great guys doing it God’s way, it’s not old fashioned, keep it real!!! God bless you for reading.

Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

The Writer, Jackie.

The Writer, Jackie.

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Every Mile Mattered

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I read a story of a woman whose story almost broke the internet after she gave birth 40 years post marriage. If she lived in my part of the world, the chastisement, judgement, and name calling would have been enough to make her feel worthless. It took four decades for her to finally own a son she can call hers. I shudder to think about the countless times she cried herself to sleep and the many days on which she felt incomplete among her peers. All those days her faith wavered, yet, she held on somehow have been rewarded.

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Recently, my cousin graduated college after six years. If you’re guessing it’s no news because medicine students spend even more years in school, then i’m sorry to burst your bubble. She needed only four years to get hold of that degree certificate she proudly has now. I hadn’t experienced someone get so fulfilled in life until i saw her clad in her graduation gown that day, I felt so proud of her. When she recounted her predicament, you could testify that it hadn’t been easy. Today, she has new song.

Photo Credit: KCube Photography

Photo Credit: KCube Photography

My very good friend tells me how he got bounced from the US embassy when he applied for a visa to study abroad. On his way back home he ate Jollof at Linda D’or Restaurant, he swore the food was bad. But that same food, he ate it again, this time after he had gotten the visa and guess what? He really enjoyed it, it was delicious. What was the magic?

I envisioned to finish my first degree at 22, start my career and be on my way to becoming one of the finest communicators, get married and start my own life…
At 25, I have none of that happening. But, I look back and see what I’ve been through. They look like detours but not exactly. I’ve not attained it all but I’m glad that I have the experiences I have gathered along the way.
It tells me that, although I’m not where I want to be yet, I’m definitely not where I wouldn’t have loved to be. I’ve been through good and bad days, I’ve met amazing and bad people. I know you have too. Take a moment and reminisce, see how all those experiences have shaped your perspective and built your character…

There’s hope to be found when life takes you on a detour. Every tear, pain, every feeling of rejection, every sorrow you gathered on your way, they don’t define who you are or what you will be. It’s history. You can choose to stay and wallow in your past if you want to. But here’s your motivation, you aren’t what you used to be and your past is not prophecy of your future. Get rid of the “shoulda, coulda, woulda’s” and position yourself to embrace what the future holds for you. If you’re already continuing in His lead…for the win. Don’t beat yourself because really, Every mile mattered .

The Writer, Jackie Hanson

The Writer, Jackie Hanson


Light and Love,
Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

Ps: The title of this article is inspired by US Singer, Nicole Nordeman’s single, “Every Mile Mattered”. You should listen to it, you’ll be inspired even more.

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In Love With A Married Man?

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You may have heard so many reasons why young women prefer married men and be disgusted at how some of them sound. Some swear that as long as they live, they will only pursue married men. What’s the inspiration? Amongst all the ‘almost reasonable’ things I have heard about this matter, the lamest I heard recently was that, the lady claimed the man said his wedded wife could not cook well. Guess who is the world’s best chef? Your guess is as good as mine.

I sampled people’s views on the subject to know what their candid opinions were. Majority of the people I spoke to out rightly condemned the act on moral and secular values. A few, however, admitted, that although it was wrong, they condone the act because circumstances lead people to do the unthinkable and so they would never say never. What about me? If you are expecting me to end this write up by concluding that sleeping with someone’s husband is good or bad, then I’m sorry to burst your bubble. However, I’d like to get you to think about these things:

1.What is good for the goose is good for the gander: If the only choice you had to solve that dire circumstance that almost killed you but didn’t kill you was to sleep with your fellow woman’s husband, and cause him to be an irresponsible man, a cheat and a liar, I don’t know what kind of abomination it is then, if your husband should bring someone either than you into your matrimonial bed. For all you know the person could be going through something even worse than yours at the time you were crawling in and out of someone’s husband’s bed. So why not?

2. Woe unto the one who causes someone’s downfall: If you are the reason someone’s husband stays out late at night, doesn’t eat from his wife’s pot, treats his wife like garbage and makes his wife look like the devil himself, Matthew 18:7 says, “Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to stumble! Such things must come, but woe to the person through whom they come!” Let it not be said of you that you put asunder what God put together. I bet you can’t carry the weight of the wrath that will come upon you. Let that cup pass you by.

3. Wouldn’t you rather be the first, one and only than ‘a go-to -need’? What dignity is there in being a side chick? What’s the point in being the other woman when you can be someone else’s main woman? Isn’t it a total waste of time especially when you know this person won’t leave his wife for you? Oh he spends lavishly on you? Is that all? Is that all you live for? Is it that you can’t find anything worth to do with your life than this? Your worth is so much more, why lower your standards? Imagine Haggai being driven away from Abraham after Sarah gave birth to Isaac. She was only sitting somewhere minding her business when Sarah suggested to her to lay with her husband, now picture Haggai being sent away because Isaac had come. Was it her fault at all? How much more you?

4. If he loves you like he says indeed, he will leave his wife and marry you. That’s just about it. Maybe you’re refusing to see but look, just look, even if he spends the whole time with you on your escapades, he still goes back home to his wife. You hate it when he leaves but he assures you he will be back soon. In the long run, he still goes back home and leaves you in the cold of the night. Is this what you want to live the rest of your life for? Would you be proud to look back on the decisions you made in some twenty years to come?

Young girls should stay away from married men. If they are the ones that pursue you, flee their temptation. As long as you hope to get married someday, you will reap whatever you sow into people’s marriages. The rate at which marriages are breaking lately is alarming and one of the underlying factors is as a result of infidelity.

Wives, pray for your husbands for their love for God to increase so they can extend it to you. Their love for God will compel them to love you the way that Christ would.

God is mighty to save and His hands are not shortened to save, neither is He deaf not to hear those who call on Him. Isaiah 59:1

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8

Light and Love,
Signed: Jackie Hanson
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The Wounded Soldier

IMG_2738Grace got unequally yoked with an unbeliever, got into an ungodly relationship that left her broken in the long run. Michael was betrayed by a friend, almost a brother, whom he trusted so much. Jasmine lost her parents in a gory accident, they were staunch Christians, and she wondered why God didn’t save them and left them to die the way they did. All these people were Christians but they got wounded.

As Christians, we encounter different levels of heart wrenching experiences that cause us so much pain then get in between our walk with God. Some of these are avoidable while others are inevitable, like death. For the latter ones, we know that our warfare is not against flesh and blood but against spiritual forces. Therefore it gives us very little ability to know when they will come in order to prepare to face them. How about those we can avoid from happening to us, like Grace’s.

Right from the onset, something about the self-styled perfect relationship didn’t look good. It was bound to fail especially for Grace whose Christian faith opposed the principles upon which the relationship started. Not that she was oblivious to the fact, she allowed her emotions to take control of her. What more? She got desperate and lost faith in God’s ability to lead her to someone in His own timing.

Slowly, she drifted. She prayed less, stopped reading and meditating on the word and stopped engaging actively in the things of God like she used to. Then the worse happened. The guy left and sister was devastated. Whose fault?

Maybe like Grace, your wounds look a lot like rejection, fear, frustration, shame, insecurity or isolation. Or perhaps the scars on your heart show up in the form of bitterness, anxiety, addiction, oppression, or depression.

Sin presents itself in different levels and when we give it the power, it comes between our relationship with God and as real as it may sound, when sin gets in our way with God, we lose confidence in going back to dwell in His presence. The scars of the wounds remind us where we were and the pains feel fresh.
We don’t have to live our lives licking our wounds when God’s Word is full of power-packed passages that offer the cure for whatever is ailing us. Here are a few guides to recovery.

1. Recognize Your Wound: Healing starts when we realize that we are weak and need help. The first step to getting freed from infirmity is accepting that there’s pain lingering on in our hearts and we need to get rid of it.

2. Retreat For Treatment: It’s good to withdraw sometimes from the world, get locked in your closet, dwell in His presence and glean of Him. The quietness that comes with staying alone away from the world and social media refreshes your spirit and energizes you. It gives you the opportunity to work out your salvation and deepens your relationship with God. When you retreat, you come to a place of pleasing an audience of one without being tempted to pretend like you got it all together.

3. Repent And Return: My pastor always says that “There can be no forgiveness without true repentance”. True repentance goes beyond feeling sorry but realising that sin is evil and detesting the thought of it. If we desist from evil because of its ability to ruin us, it’s not enough. Rather, when we hate it because God hates it too. From this point, we can experience God’s forgiveness. After repentance, return to the former works and please God like never before. Support others and show compassion to other wounded soldiers, give them hope and show them the way.

4. Rest On His Promises: Trusting God’s word doesn’t always seem easy as it sounds especially when you can’t see beyond the circumstance. Sometimes it’s hard to let go of our wounds and wind up wearing them as badges of honour. God is unchangeable and so are His promises. “They are ye and Amen”. So whether we choose to admit it or not, His promises will still be and He will remain faithful. When the times comes, he does as He says He will.

Good news is, we don’t have to live the rest of our lives wounded. God waits for us with open arms and He is our endless comforter. That part of scripture that says “He heals the broken-hearted, and binds up their wounds” gives me so much warmth.

I don’t know what wounds you wear, it may be smelly and look so bad beyond repair but Let Jesus in, He’s the balm of Gilead and he says “There is more in the balm to heal than there is in guilt to wound; for there is more in grace to save than there is in sin to destroy.” Jer 8;22 Let this be your inspiration!

Signed: The Khayil Woman
Jackie Hanson

Ps: This message is inspired by a message preached by Ps Jacob Ahenkorah at one of Lifeline Ministries’ all-night service.

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Broken For A Purpose: Broken To Be Built.

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I still remember when my heart got broken. Yes that was me and girl, trust me when I say broken. I mean how could the guy who professed to love me to the moon and back walk out on me with no reason barely 6 months into the relationship? (I felt my world had crushed, well it did.) He was like an angel from the beginning and the last time I checked angels do not hurt. So how come? How naïve?

Sadly in midday of March, little did I know that all the beautiful times, constant care and attention we shared would one day come to an end. What worsened the matter was that he walked out without an explanation. He left too many questions on my mind I could not find answers to. I mean everything was ok between us. He wasn’t like the other guys who felt abstaining from sex till marriage was primitive.

As a matter of fact, he commended me for upholding my values. He supported my dreams and encouraged me towards attaining my goals. So what the hell had gone wrong with my prince charming? I needed answers yet I couldn’t find any. I couldn’t understand why everything that seemed so perfect all of a sudden would mean nothing at all.

At first I thought it was a joke. But the calls stopped coming and the messages stopped flooding my inbox. It was real. I cried weeks on end, I listened to music I felt was soothing, no hugs were comforting and no words of motivation were motivating enough. All my writings were about him and the bitter experience. I was in the doldrums. Nothing ever hurt so badly like that.

I felt God had forsaken me. I didn’t even think I will be writing this today, no. Not until that conference in May, the Rhema Conference. After the service, I received the call that changed my life. The man of God told me God’s eyes are on me and that I should surrender all to him. That I couldn’t make it on my own. And that, I should no longer fret about what didn’t matter. And that was all the inspiration I needed. My first love got me! Shoop a doop Jackie!

There was a transformation. There was an urgency to draw closer to God. I run back into my heavenly father’s arms for his comfort. I had left him for so long chasing a mortal who could offer me nothing but heartbreak. He was more than ready to receive me once I acknowledged his existence. He knew I was going to be hurt but I guess he wanted me to go through the remnants of a broken heart.

Now I yearned to have a personal relationship with God. I studied the Bible as a priority. I prayed and cried to God for recuperation. He healed me and made me better. I emerged from the heartbreak with a scar which reminds me everyday on thriving towards becoming the phenomenal woman that God made me to be. I have become stronger and wiser by grace of God. Yet again, I have learned to follow God’s wisdom and forgiveness. I learned to have faith in God to lead me to someone in His timing.

Today, I can say confidently that I was broken but God is using my brokenness to build other people who find themselves in the position i was some years ago, which is all that this blog is about.

So thank you for always stopping by to read when there is something new up here, i hope God helps you to put the pieces in your life together so you can have an amazing story to tell and heal the world.
Sometimes, just sometimes, it’s darkest before the dawn!
Light and Love!

Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

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Broken Crayons Still Colour

Broken Crayons...

Broken Crayons…


Sometimes, I feel short of myself and feel as if I’m not good enough. I admire those who are in the sciences and other fields either than arts. I disqualify myself because I feel that those who are in science related fields are better humans than I am.

However, growing up, all I had ever wanted to be was a communicator. By all means, either through writing or broadcasting.
I look down on myself when I meet people who have other backgrounds but can at the same time can do what I do. Be it writing or public speaking etc…. It makes me think that I don’t measure up.

I often hear people say, “Broken Crayons Still Colour” but i have never taken the pain to really understand what they mean by that. Recently, i saw a friend’s picture with that statement as caption. It struck me and i thought about it.

I bet I’m not the only one who ever thinks I’m not good enough or don’t measure up. Like, I’m too broken and need to be perfect, which can never be.
It took me to look deeper into myself and embrace who I am, just who I am and all that I can be. I learned to stop comparing myself with others, it’s unwise.

Truth is, we all have something unique to offer to this world. To inspire, to motivate, to influence, to help, to build and to add colour where there is dusk. There is something we can do with the little we have.

Yesterday at I Choose to Choose, I learned that there is a purpose for each person and that purpose doesn’t disappear because we think we don’t measure up. Even if so, maybe that brokenness or cracked container is just what the world needs.

We all aren’t perfect and so I don’t like to be around people who pretend to be perfect or have it all together. We need to be real, quit the pretence. To keep colouring even when we’re broken, when we think we don’t measure up and give hope to those who need it.

So go out of your way and find a broken person today. Tell them they have something to offer the world, stir up that mindset in them. But if that broken person is you, you know what to do, keep colouring, let’s all keep colouring and we will together make a masterpiece. Every tiny piece of a broken crayon can colour .

So yes, i may not be be a neurologist or pharmacist but I have something in me this world needs and so do you!

Whenever you feel less of yourself, remember that “you are God’s masterpiece, created in Christ Jesus to do good works….”

Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman.

The Writer, Jackie Hanson

The Writer, Jackie Hanson

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Beyond Diamond Rings And Pearls…

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Photo Credit: Omega Pictures

Melissa looked down at David on one knee as tears rolled down her eyes. She had rejected Dave’s marriage proposal and David was shocked without any idea why she said ‘No”. He was hopeful the well planned night was going to be a positive one but the lady wasn’t having it.

David was every young girl’s dream. His looks were charming, he was highly intelligent and had recently graduated with a doctorate degree at age 29. He had secured a job with one of the top private oil companies in the city and to say life was going well is an understatement.

Melissa was beautiful, calm yet strong willed. She was clever and paid utmost attention to the slightest detail. She was passionate about the things of God and won’t trade her values for Brazilian hair or Zara shoes. She worked with a tele-communications company and had risen through the ranks to become the company’s first female Director of operations. She was doing very well for a girl at her age.

They met on trotro when Melissa was interning at the company she works for now about 5 years ago. Dave was headed the same direction too. He was struck by her beauty that morning and so, he didn’t miss the least opportunity he got to talk with Mel. He tried to start a conversation but Melissa looked as if she wasn’t in the mood. He persisted. “Let me pay your fare”. She replied snubbing him, “No, I will, myself “.
“Ok then you pay for me”…This time with a grimace on her face in an attempt to make this ‘NO’ resound in his ears and heart if possible.
He paid for her irrespective of the strong warning. Melissa was amazed at this new guy’s persistent persona, like, a go getter. That was how they became friends…

She was there when David lost her mother that fateful day in a gory accident, after being hit by a truck, she was the first he called when he heard about his mom’s demise. She was there when David applied for the scholarship abroad and was denied 4 times. She was there when David’s ex-girlfriend accused him of impregnating her. She was there when Dave finally gained admission to Massachusetts Institute of Technology, she had been with him through thick and thin. She was his ride or die.

David only realized how much Melissa meant to him when he was away from home. So he had made plans that when he finally got home, he will marry her. He disclosed his love interest to her a night before he left and left it for her to think through. Mel had always known that David liked her but she didn’t know it was that deep. But really…she also had a soft spot for him and so it looked more as if it was in the right direction.

Fast forward today, why was Melissa saying No to David? It called for a lot of thoughts to rush through his mind. He demanded to know what was going on and she was ready to spill the bean. Not that she didn’t love him? Yes she did but….

David had an ill attitude that Melissa abhorred. He never liked to say sorry when he was at fault. You’d say it was pride, there was more to it. He also believed that as a woman, you win a man’s heart and attention when you subject to his decisions and actions even when they are ill fated. She tried several times to make him understand that she wasn’t pleased with his attitude but Dave will tag her a nag and give her no room to talk about it. She dealt with his attitude for a long time and pretended as though everything was ok. There was even a time Dave told her when she tried to complain that, if she couldn’t put up with him, she could walk away but Melissa stayed in hopes that he will change. She wasn’t happy! But David was an amazing guy, very thoughtful and kind but all that will mean nothing to Mel if he didn’t deal with that canker.
So that was it. She mustered courage and let if off her chest.

At the end, David had his head buried in his palms and found it difficult to speak. Finally when he found his voice, he admitted to Mel’s claims and here’s what he had to say:

“Mel, I won’t dispute all that you’ve said, it’s true. Can you blame me? It’s exactly how I saw my father treat my mom. I thought it was the best way cus after all, my parents were married for 32 years until my mom passed. I only got to know through my Auntie Tina that, my mother wasn’t happy in her marital life although she looked as if she was the happiest woman alive. She even went on to say that she thinks it was better she passed cus she was going through unbearable pain married to a man like my dad.

However, I never knew my behaviour will cost me to the extent of losing you. I thought it was the best thing to do to keep our relationship ablaze. I thought you loved the idea of getting married and having a family but if my attitude can make you rescind your decision, I bet it’s serious than what it looks like. You are good woman and every man will be blessed to have you, I can’t afford to let you go. I promise to do anything to make me a better man, you just name it.

Mel gawked at Dave in amazement. Did he mean all that he just said? She thought 💭

Long story short, Dave accepted to start a counselling session to help him manage his character.
Melissa agreed to be by his side as he went through therapy but she insisted he held on to the 20 carat diamond ring 💍 in the meantime.
You’ll think her reason for her actions is ridiculous but that was her own way of sending a message across to the world and to ladies like herself who will batter trade their values, happiness among other things all in the name of getting married or for a diamond ring.

Truth be told, not everyone is fashioned to get married anyway. Thank God when you get a good spouse but don’t settle just because everyone else is getting married, don’t beat yourself to death.

Not that Melissa was perfect, neither did she intend to make David a perfect man, all she wanted was to have a better man who will help in creating a happy environment for the future.

The Writer, Jackie Hanson

The Writer, Jackie Hanson

Signed: Jackie Hanson
The Khayil Woman

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“5 Reasons People Go Back To the Things That Break Them”-In Relationships

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Everyone’s wish in every sphere of their lives is that, they will prosper in the ventures they embark on. The same rule applies when we meet someone and develop feelings for them. A normal person will hope that, that platonic relationship will flourish and eventually bloom into something beautiful and forever.

Whereas, some people are simply fortunate, others get tossed in a roller coaster characterized with numerous and unthinkable challenges. Some of the awful things that happen to us (those who get hurt over and over again) are result of the fact that, we allow them to happen to us, knowing or unknowingly.

In love and relationships, the assumption is that, you can’t give up on love because someone hurt you. But as you do, sometimes, you unintentionally give yourself away to be hurt again. Here are five reasons why people go back to the things that break them:

1. We don’t heal completely: When you go through the pain of a failed relationship, it’s often not advisable to jump into another one with hopes of getting better. You need to go through recuperation process (see my post on Recuperation Process).
It may take some long time but you need to go through it. Breakups are not pleasant experiences, you can’t afford keep ending up in there.

2. We become tired of waiting: Like I said in the previous point, recuperation may take a very long time. However, that is no excuse to start another one when you are still nursing bruises from the past. No one likes to wait for whatever but if indeed the saying “the best things come to those who wait” is true then wouldn’t you rather wait?

3. We get shifted in focus: Especially in our walk with God, when we stop getting closer to
God, that is, when we allow little foxes to get into our walk with Him, it ruins the relationship. So bad so that, now we don’t seek His consent in our endeavours and move away from His counsel. Once our relationship with God becomes unsteady, we will keep running into things that will break than repair us. Stay with God!

4. We pretend to be ok when we aren’t: Here’s one major reason why we keep going through pain over and over again. Because we feign our personalities and pretend as though everything is ok when everything is not ok. Because we want to be on the same page as everyone else and be in relationships that are detrimental to our well being. So when a guy shows you a simple gesture of kindness today, you jump into his arms tomorrow flattered that he loves you only to find yourself in ruins all over again. Quit the pretense!

5. Holding on in hopes of getting better: Until you find yourself in that situation, you will think it’s ridiculous for people to stay in relationships that are not pleasurable. But you know, sometimes people just love the idea of being in a relationship for the beauty of it. That among many reasons is why they still remain in them regardless how abusive they are. Or typically, because they wouldn’t like to be lonely or single again, they will choose to stay. What’s the point? Rather be alone than unhappy!

There are so many lessons that failed relationships teach us. If we don’t allow ourselves to be taught by them, we won’t appreciate them. Don’t be ashamed of the scars they leave you with. Scars are a proof that God heals and a reminder that He’s faithful. He will honour at the right time in His acceptable year. Get up, wipe the dust off you and embrace your bright future that’s ahead of you. Remain blessed.

Light and Love,
Jackie.
The Khayil Woman.

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Maids That Pray…

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The story is told of a to-be bride who died a week before which doubles as her wedding and birthday. All of a sudden she started complaining of an unusual and uncomfortable feeling which eventually got her bedridden.

According to doctors diagnoses, cancer had eaten its way into one of her breasts and it needed to be gotten rid of.
However, anytime the scheduled date was due for the surgery, miraculously, the diagnosed cancer would have vanished. It took 3 different doctors to hit and miss on this issue. Eventually, she gave up the ghost. I bet the pain was unbearable.

Few months later after this lady’s demise, her to be maid of honor marries her late friend’s fiancé and gives birth to 2 children. How’s that??? I’ll spare you the details and leave it to you to make your own conclusions on how this story unfolds.

That brings me to the whole idea of the significance of “maids of honor or bridesmaids ” on your wedding day.
From what I gather and see, the maid of honor and bridesmaids pose as the bride’s eyes and see to the success of the ceremony and her support system respectively before and on the d-day.
They are normally supposed to be a trusted friend or a sister.

Our society places a lot of credence on marriage and so does God so you should count yourself blessed once you find a good man who is ready to walk you down the isle into forever. I believe that family and friends in your circle have a role to play in the success or failure of your marriage especially, once you give them the chance.

Dear to-be bride, know this, not everyone who smiles in your face and poses as your bff wants the best for you. So don’t just go choosing a bridesmaid because you can, let the Holy Spirit guide you every step of the way. Your bridesmaids are the people that surround you on your wedding day and sometimes get involved heavily in your wedding planning that’s if you choose to. In effect, what you choose shapes your support system.

Not all your friends or bridesmaids may be Christians but be sure that these ones wish you the best and pray for you incessantly. It’s the best gift they could ever give you.
So long as you keep your focus on Christ and you have enough spiritual support, I trust you will be fine. We see most people today investing a lot of energy into planning their wedding but little can be said of the real deal.

In a nutshell, the significance of your bridal team should be the kind that throw their weight behind you spiritually and use the opportunity to share the love of Christ in an intimate way. The women you have by your side on your wedding day should be the ones that slay because they pray! All the best!

Light and love,
Jackie.
The Khayil Woman

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No rust, no moth…Think Heaven “

IMG_4963“No rust, no moth….Think Heaven”

Either the dress looked too ravishing that i couldn’t resist its charm as displayed boldly on the mannequin at the boutique, or the shoe is in vogue and i have to be the chic , or my neighbor looked pretty in that pink lipstick and i feel i will look rather prettier in it or i simply can’t repeat the same outfit to that upcoming concert blah blah blah!… Oftentimes, I have purchased items i didn’t really need and spent money I didn’t have.

Come to think of it, what’s wrong with wearing the same attire to a different concert actually? And what’s the prize for competing with that neighbor or being up to date with trend anyway?

I have lived beyond my expense and I couldn’t attribute it to any thing tangible. I could have saved that money to secure a provident future. Sadly, for some of us, it’s only after the act we feel silly. We shouldn’t have bought it but we did and they aren’t refundable. That’s our loss. Sorry!

Too many times, the idea is to look gorgeous and have the glamorous life. We invest our funds into gadgets and garments.
Until I realized that the lifestyle was unscrupulous, it had done me more harm than good and I had to find a remedy to save me from the detriment.

It was there that I found real meaning to the scripture, ‘’Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in Heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal”. Matthew 6:19-20
I had to acknowledge the fact that I can’t have everything I desire in this life.

At a point, I had to shut my senses when I got to where em’ fancy stuff was displayed. I trained myself to live by my means and standards. Thank God for giving me the power to walk away from the world where I felt I could have it all.

As a matter of fact, our Christian walk cannot be complete if we resort to fixing our affections on earthly things. (Colossians 3:1) But rather, I pray God helps us to tune our minds to all the virtues that will aid us live lives worth the redemption through our Lord Jesus Christ.

May we never lose sight of the gospel while we still can so we can be caught up with Him when He shows up in His glory. Amen.

Signed: Jackie Hanson
(The Khayil Woman)

The writer, Jackie Hanson

The writer, Jackie Hanson

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